Ndiaye, Harlem Globetrotters-Style Moves and Revealing Football Statistics

YOU’RE TELLING US THERE’S A CHANCE?

Unless you’ve missed the video of Iliman Ndiaye pulling off a unusual dribbling move at Everton’s training ground, it’s a good watch. Through performing a move so nasty that it would have been appropriate at a Harlem Globetrotters exhibition match, the skill quickly concluded what was meant to be a lighthearted kickabout to finish what had been – up to that point – an informative discussion about how Sunday league footballers can secure a fresh start after being dropped from professional academies.

Ndiaye, who featured in non-league games directly before being recruited by Sheffield United at 19, is perfectly positioned to speak on this topic. “Avoid dwelling on the rejection and one day your luck is going to arrive,” he advised a young player just before using said ninja move on his victim, in doing so perfectly illustrating the gap between Premier League and amateur footballers he had been trying to bridge.

Ndiaye joins a list of professional footballer to take things that little bit too far. Peak Michael Owen cheerfully overwhelming a young shot-stopper in front of a annoyed Neville Southall is obviously the gold standard in this specific category – but the ex-Anfield star is far from the only offender. Both Christian Eriksen and Shinji Kagawa have reduced toddlers to actual tears with a series of merciless tricks, although it’s considered that the latter was at least driven by the Japanese player’s social media regretful message – “difficulty breeds resilience” – and the associated label of #friendship.

Kagawa’s ex-BVB colleagues Lukasz Piszczek, Jakub Blaszczykowski and Nuri Sahin at least had the good grace to be defeated against 100 children when the three competed during the interval of their final match for BVB. A Real Madrid XI that included Cristiano Ronaldo and Xabi Alonso were not so generous when they took on 109 Chinese kids in a similar experiment. But returning to the beginning, it’s approximated that only 180 of the 1.5 million boys currently playing competitive youth leagues in England will ever appear in the Premier League, a stark reality for toddlers and teenagers across the country.

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FEATURED STATEMENT

“The game guided me but it never left me because I never stopped believing. I went from place to place. The love of football propels you. I couldn’t always see where it was directing me. But today I have the solution” – national team manager Veljko Paunovic takes time out from his preparations to reflect on his career.

READER CORRESPONDENCE

“Good to know that Kevin Mac Allister will be included by Argentina. Ideally, if he goes to the international competition next year, he’ll read up on how to travel around the venue locations – let’s avoid him being disoriented in New York” – James Humphries.

“Information shows that 1,024 players in the Turkish league have been banned due to alleged involvement in a betting scandal. It would be wonderful if that number could be raised to the same level of typical pedantry associated with Football Daily – that is, 1,057 readers. By my calculation, that’s about 33 more perfectionists. If I offer to be suspended from playing professionally in Turkey (hardly a difficult decision at my age and, um, skill level), are there 32 more folks willing to join in my search for balance?” – Mike Wilner.

“As a frequent consumer and Florida resident, can I proactively complain about the next several days of published letters about which highway one uses to get to various locations in your homeland? I mean, I was stuck in gridlock on I-4 at 2am on a Tuesday night driving through Orlando once, but that’s the complete account. There’s no rewarding moral to the tale. (I-4 connects Tampa on the Gulf Coast to Daytona on the Atlantic via Orlando/Walt Disney World, and can have traffic issues at any time)” – Rasteen Nowroozi.

“Apropos Wythenshawe FC, I recall many years ago playing for a Sunday, very recreational club, Turnpike Lane Hibs, on Clapham Common. One morning a bloke presented as ‘Danny’ turned up to play. I have no idea who recruited him. Reportedly he was an actor; he had a good left side. (Yes, Daniel Day-Lewis)” – Jason Steger.

“Together with some colleagues and friends, I play a game of football each Friday afternoon. Our most experienced participant is pushing 80, while the youngest are in their late-20s. To ensure a enjoyable experience for everyone, we have a straightforward principle regarding the quality of player: you can be fast or skilled, but ideally not both. We occasionally have players who violate this rule, but usually typically reduce them to our quality over time” – Lars Esbjerg.